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class="t_fsz"> <table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td class="t_f" id="postmessage_582597"> １．有一天，有一个软糖在街上走路。 &shy;<br /> <br /> 她走着走着，突然说：“啊呀！我的腿好软啊！” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２．从前有一个人姓余， &shy;<br /> <br /> 有一天他饿了， &shy;<br /> <br /> 就把自己给吃了.... &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３．一个同学名叫小蔡，他在路上走着走着，突然被端起来了.. &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ４．有个香蕉先生和女朋友约会，走在街上，天气很热，香蕉先生就把衣服脱掉了，之后他的女朋友就摔倒了 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ５．有一只北极熊和一只企鹅在一起耍，企鹅把身上的毛一根一根地拔了下来，拔完之后，对北极熊说:“好冷哦！” &shy;<br /> <br /> 北极熊听了，也把自己身上的毛一根一根地拔了下来，转头对企鹅说：“果然很冷！” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ６．有一天绿豆自杀从5楼跳下来，流了很多血，变成了红豆；一直流脓，又变成了黄豆；伤口结了疤，最后成了黑豆。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ７．一天，豆沙包在马路上走着，突然出了车祸，肚皮被撞破了，临死前，他看了看自己的肚子说：“哦，原来我是豆沙包。” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ８．火柴棍突然觉得头很痒，就伸手挠，挠着挠着就把自己烧死了。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ９．小明新理了发，第二天来到学校，同学们看到他的新发型，笑道：小明，你的头型好像个风筝哦！小明觉得很委屈，就跑到外面哭。哭着哭着～他就飞起来了... &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １０．从前从前有一只鸟 &shy;<br /> <br /> 他每天都会经过一片玉米田 &shy;<br /> <br /> 但是很不幸的 &shy;<br /> <br /> 有一天那片玉米田发生了火灾 &shy;<br /> <br /> 所有的玉米都变成了爆米花 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小鸟飞过去以後...... &shy;<br /> <br /> 以为下雪，就冷死了... &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １１．有个人长的像洋葱，走着走着就哭了.. &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １２．小企鹅有一天问他奶奶，“奶奶奶奶，我是不是一只企鹅啊？”“是啊，你当然是企鹅。”小企鹅又问爸爸，“爸爸爸爸，我是不是一只企鹅啊？”“是啊，你是企鹅啊，怎么了?”“可是，可是我怎么觉得那么冷呢？” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １３．有一个躲猫猫社团，他们团长现在还没找到. &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １４．飞机上，一位空中小姐问一个小女孩说:“为什么飞机飞这么高都不会撞到星星呢?“ &shy;<br /> <br /> 小女孩回答到:“我知道，因为星星会’闪’啊!“ &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １５．有一对玉米相爱了 &shy;<br /> <br /> 于是它们决定结婚 &shy;<br /> <br /> 结婚那天 &shy;<br /> <br /> 一个玉米找不到另一个玉米了 &shy;<br /> <br /> 这个玉米就问身旁的爆米花：你看到我们家玉米了吗。 &shy;<br /> <br /> 爆米花：亲爱的，人家穿婚纱了嘛 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １６．一天，一块三分熟的牛排在街上走着，突然他在前方看到一块五分熟的牛排，可却没有理会 他 &shy;<br /> <br /> 问:他们为什么没打招呼? &shy;<br /> <br /> 答:因为他们不熟.. &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １７．请问： &shy;<br /> <br /> 米的妈妈是谁？ &shy;<br /> <br /> ——是花，因为“花生米”。 &shy;<br /> <br /> 米的爸爸是谁？ &shy;<br /> <br /> ——是蝶，国为“蝶恋花”。 &shy;<br /> <br /> 米的外婆是谁？ &shy;<br /> <br /> ——是妙笔，因为“妙笔生花”。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １８．有一个胖子.......... &shy;<br /> <br /> 从高楼跳下... &shy;<br /> <br /> 结果变成了....... &shy;<br /> <br /> 死胖子.. &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> １９．有天一颗绿苹果出去逛街，忽然看到一颗红苹果，他就对红苹果说... &shy;<br /> <br /> 你暗恋我唷，否则干嘛脸红... &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２０．音乐课上 老师弹了一首贝多芬的曲子 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小明问小华：“你懂音乐吗？” &shy;<br /> <br /> 小华：“是的” &shy;<br /> <br /> 小明：“那你知道老师在弹什麼吗？” &shy;<br /> <br /> 小华: “钢琴。” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２１．小红问：你搅拌咖啡的时候用右手还是左手 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小美说：右手 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小红说：哦，你好厉害哦，都不会怕烫，像我都用汤匙的。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２２．小A对小B说: 挖塞 ....外面下雨了也！！ 看到没 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小B很兴奋:是啊 我看到了 你呢 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２３．小明一直央求妈妈让他当艺人， &shy;<br /> <br /> 妈妈说「你年纪还小，以后再说」，小明不死心，还是不断求妈妈 &shy;<br /> <br /> 最后妈妈受不了了，发飚道： &shy;<br /> <br /> 「我们生下来就是红豆，不可能成为艺人（薏仁），你死心吧！」 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２４．小蛇很慌张地问大蛇哥哥..“哥哥，我们有没有毒？？”大蛇说:“你问这干吗.？”小蛇说:“我刚才不小心把自己舌头咬到了。” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２５．从前有番茄甲和番茄乙一起去逛街 &shy;<br /> <br /> 然后有一天 突然有一台卡车冲了出来把番茄甲压了过去 &shy;<br /> <br /> 番茄乙在一旁 指着番茄甲大笑 &shy;<br /> <br /> [哈.哈.哈. 番茄酱~] &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２６．巧克力和西红柿打架，巧克力赢了。 &shy;<br /> <br /> 为什么呢？ &shy;<br /> <br /> 因为巧克力棒～ &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２７．龟兔赛跑...兔子很快跑到前面去了.. &shy;<br /> <br /> 乌龟看到一只蜗牛爬得很慢很慢..对他说:你上来，我背你吧.. &shy;<br /> <br /> 然后..蜗牛就上来了.. &shy;<br /> <br /> 过了一会..乌龟又看到一只蚂蚁..对他说:你也上来吧.. &shy;<br /> <br /> 于是蚂蚁也上来了。. &shy;<br /> <br /> 蚂蚁上来以后..看到上面的蜗牛..对他说了句“你好” &shy;<br /> <br /> 你们知道蜗牛说什么吗?? &shy;<br /> <br /> 蜗牛说:你抓紧点,这乌龟好快... &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２８．有两个人掉到陷阱里了，死的人叫死人，活人叫什么? &shy;<br /> <br /> A:叫救命啦! &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ２９．小明说：「阿康，问你“有一只鲨鱼吃下了一颗绿豆,结果它变成了什么”？」 &shy;<br /> <br /> 阿康说：「我不知道，答案是什么？」 &shy;<br /> <br /> 小明说：「答案是“绿豆沙(绿豆鲨)”啊，你很笨喔！」 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３０．Q：一只兔子和一只跑得很快的乌龟赛跑，猜一猜谁赢拉？ &shy;<br /> <br /> A：兔子~~ &shy;<br /> <br /> Q：错~！是乌龟拉，前面有说是一只跑很快的乌龟，跑很快噢~~ &shy;<br /> <br /> Q：兔子不甘心，又和一只戴了墨镜的乌龟比赛跑步，这次谁赢拉？ &shy;<br /> <br /> A：恩。。兔子吧 &shy;<br /> <br /> Q：错~~！那只乌龟把墨镜一摘，也！又是刚才那只跑很快的乌龟噢^O^ &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３１．MM找大学迷路了。遇见一位文质彬彬的教授。 &shy;<br /> <br /> MM：请问，我怎样才能到大学去？ &shy;<br /> <br /> 教授：只有努力读书，才可以上大学。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３２．火柴棍突然觉得头很痒，就伸手挠，挠着挠着就把自己烧死了。 &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３３．有一对男女正在吃晚餐 &shy;<br /> <br /> 那个女生一直问那个男生:你爱不爱我? &shy;<br /> <br /> 男生看了女生一眼又继续吃晚餐 &shy;<br /> <br /> 女生很生气又再问了一次:你爱不爱我? &shy;<br /> <br /> 男生终于说:爱 &shy;<br /> <br /> 女生又问:那你要怎么证明? &shy;<br /> <br /> 忽然男生从口袋里拿了三十元出来, &shy;<br /> <br /> 且问女生:你有没有十元? &shy;<br /> <br /> 女生拿了十元给了男生.. &shy;<br /> <br /> 男生就把四十元放在桌上 &shy;<br /> <br /> 过了一会儿..... &shy;<br /> <br /> 女生很生气的问男生:你到底要不要证明你爱我啊 &shy;<br /> <br /> 男生说我己经证明了啊!!! &shy;<br /> <br /> 四十摆在眼前！ &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３４．一大学生不幸被敌人抓住，敌人把他绑在了电线杆上，然后问他：“说，你是哪里的？不说就 电死你！！！”这个大学生回了敌人一句话，结果被电死了…… &shy;<br /> <br /> 他说：“我是电大的！” &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３５．问：丹丹是小狗的名字还是小老虎的名字 &shy;<br /> <br /> 答：老虎，因为虎视耽耽嘛~ &shy;<br /> <br /> &shy;<br /> <br /> ３６．先在桌子上放个笔记本 &shy;<br /> <br /> 然后把你的下巴放在笔记本上 &shy;<br /> <br /> 好了 &shy;<br /> <br /> 这是我送你的礼物 &shy;<br /> <br /> 笔记本垫脑 &shy;</td></tr></table> </div> <div id="comment_582597" class="cm"> </div> <div id="post_rate_div_582597"></div> </div> </div> </td></tr> <tr><td class="plc plm"> <div id="p_btn" class="mtw mbm hm cl"> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=spacecp&ac=favorite&type=thread&id=91075&formhash=36b37033" id="k_favorite" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href, 'get', 0);" onmouseover="this.title = $('favoritenumber').innerHTML + ' 人收藏'" title="收藏本帖"><i><img src="static/image/common/fav.gif" alt="收藏" />收藏<span id="favoritenumber" style="display:none">0</span></i></a> <a class="followp" 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href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=highlight&idtype=tid&id=91075" id="a_stick" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static/image/magic/highlight.small.gif" />变色卡</a></li> <li><a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=sofa&idtype=tid&id=91075" id="a_stick" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static/image/magic/sofa.small.gif" />抢沙发</a></li> <li><a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=jack&idtype=tid&id=91075" id="a_jack" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static/image/magic/jack.small.gif" />千斤顶</a></li> <li><a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=namepost&idtype=pid&id=582597:91075" id="a_namepost_582597" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static/image/magic/namepost.small.gif" />显身卡</a><li> </ul> <script type="text/javascript" reload="1">checkmgcmn('post_582597')</script> </div> </div> </td> </tr> <tr class="ad"> <td class="pls"> </td> <td class="plc"> </td> </tr> </table> </div><div class="postaaa posta1" id="post_582659" ><table id="pid582659" class="plhin" summary="pid582659" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td class="pls" rowspan="2"> <div id="favatar582659" class="pls favatar"> <a name="lastpost"></a><div class="pi"> <div class="authi"><a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-53883.html" target="_blank" class="xw1" style="color: #FF9900">yylzoptics</a> </div> </div> <div class="p_pop blk bui card_gender_" id="userinfo582659" style="display: none; margin-top: -11px;"> <div class="m z"> <div id="userinfo582659_ma"></div> </div> <div class="i y"> <div> <strong><a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-53883.html" target="_blank" class="xi2" style="color: #FF9900">yylzoptics</a></strong> <em>当前离线</em> </div><dl class="cl"> <dt>积分</dt><dd><a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=space&uid=53883&do=profile" target="_blank" class="xi2">15591</a></dd> </dl><div class="imicn"> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=space&uid=53883&do=profile" target="_blank" title="查看详细资料"><img src="static/image/common/userinfo.gif" alt="查看详细资料" /></a> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=showip&idtype=user&id=yylzoptics" id="a_showip_li_582659" class="xi2" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static//image/magic/showip.small.gif" alt="" /> IP卡</a> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/home.php?mod=magic&mid=checkonline&idtype=user&id=yylzoptics" id="a_repent_582659" class="xi2" onclick="showWindow(this.id, this.href)"><img src="static//image/magic/checkonline.small.gif" alt="" /> 狗仔卡</a> </div> <div id="avatarfeed"><span id="threadsortswait"></span></div> </div> </div> <div> <div class="avatar"><a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-53883.html" class="avtm" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.oecr.com/uc_server/avatar.php?uid=53883&size=middle" /></a></div> </div> </div> </td> <td class="plc"> <div class="pi"> <strong> <a href="http://bbs.oecr.com/forum.php?mod=redirect&goto=findpost&ptid=91075&pid=582659" id="postnum582659" onclick="setCopy(this.href, '帖子地址复制成功');return false;"> <em>2</em>楼</a> </strong> <div class="pti"> <div class="pdbt"> </div> <div class="authi"> <img class="authicn vm" id="authicon582659" src="static/image/common/online_member.gif" /> <em id="authorposton582659">发表于 2009-8-14 12:35:30</em> <span class="pipe">|</span> <a href="http://bbs.oecr.com/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=91075&page=1&authorid=53883" rel="nofollow">只看该作者</a> </div> </div> </div><div class="pct"><div class="pcb"> <div class="t_fsz"> <table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td class="t_f" id="postmessage_582659"> 看了这个帖子，在大热天的最大好处，<br /> 一冷到底~</td></tr></table> </div> <div id="comment_582659" class="cm"> </div> <div id="post_rate_div_582659"></div> </div> </div> </td></tr> <tr><td class="plc plm"> </td> </tr> <tr id="_postposition582659"></tr> <tr> <td class="pls"></td> <td class="plc" style="overflow:visible;"> <div class="po hin"> <div class="pob cl"> <em> <a class="fastre" 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